Racist Math Ahmed is on a train from D.C to New York the train is traveling at 125 mph. the distance between New York and D.C is 250 miles. How many will die in the blast.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Walking down a cold, lonely, deserted street is a 10 year old who lost her parents. she has with her in plain sight her fathers wallet, so full of cash that it is literally too full. all of a sudden, a black man with a gum jumps out from around the corner. he then proceeds to mug her and shoot her. thanking the man for playing cops with her using finger guns, she goes home with a new coffee mug and a stick of gum. she died three days later from unrelated incidents.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is yellow, and cannot swim? A School Bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Holy Tulip Answer- Sexy Mofo

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Person One: Knock Knock Person Two: Whos there? Person One: You can see its obviously me because theres not really a door there.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Colnel Sanders cross the road? Colnel Ryan Sanders crossed the road to attack Taliban fighters who were endangering his military presence.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the little boy's hair messed up on picture day? Because he was brutally stabbed in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Do you know any anti-jokes. Yeah, I do. It's a bit pointless though.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

boobs!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

thumb_up thumb_down -6

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops