Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Old, Asian, Woman who drive

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

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2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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If you have a stroke, call 000

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What is the difference between a Nigga and a bucket of shit? ....The bucket.

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I suck at poetry. Nice tits.

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Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

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What's big, white, and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

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If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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