What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

thumb_up thumb_down -80

Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

thumb_up thumb_down -136

How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

thumb_up thumb_down +61

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

thumb_up thumb_down +49

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

thumb_up thumb_down +33

where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

girls basketball

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A horse walked into a barn...

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a Jewish man do when he sees a new car? Doesn't buy it because he puts his money in a fund.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops