A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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whats the difference between friends and cement? if you soak friends in liquid and then repeatadly shock them they will die

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All Bin Laden wanted was peace on earth and good will toward men.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

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Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

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A young boy walks into a catholic church, he attends mass, and leaves.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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What did Lois say to Peter? Who cares... Family Guy is a stupid show.

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3 like an eel

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Why did the Mexican go to Taco Bell? Because he thought it was a real restaurant.

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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Q: What did the cat say to the dog? A: I hate you, alot

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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knock, knock who's there? Dave. ....oh well dave's not here man.

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You know what the Germans have to say about problems? For every problem there is a final solution.

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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