What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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Women's rights.

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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