- Anti Joke

Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

I was watching Fox news.

What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

What do you call a white duck? A quacker

Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Hey, speaking of anti jokes, there is much in the bible that facinates me, but that I find to be... Very... Ilogical, but then again I know a lot about the spiritual to open the the possibility to the (maybe) fact that the answers lie in the spiritual realm or you know whatever you prefer to call it. But you know, God has existed for eternities eternal etc, forever, and only some few thousand years ago he decided to let there be light? Kinda makes sense to why he was such a hardass in the first testament, I mean wow it must have been depressive for eternal eternities until he created light huh? Maybe he slept as many other Gods tend to do in a theological perspective. The other that baffles me completely: God has an enemy known as Sin, that is so powerful that he must sacrifice his own son in order to keep it away? I mean has Sin ever sacrificed anything to good? In that way they would be opposites and not God sarcificing stuff as humans sacrificed stuff animals (and almost a son Iscaac right? Because you know God and Satan where kinda chummy and enjoyed betting and good sport... My viewpoint at least) And Now I just repeat myself, but if Light was Gods first invention, who created voice? Was it part of his being? Why was light not part of his being? Is light not the path to God? "The Light"? Its horsehead Network and I do not expect much of this site sincerely, but if you find the time, the care, the love and Guidance of God provides (yeah I am appealing to your Good Christian side) then please find it in your Jesus filled heart to leave me what you think is missing or perhaps I do not understand at all. And if I ever become a Christian again, ill tell God and Jesus that you where the person that got me there, put in a good word for eternal life huh? Get you and maybe even your mother and father that made you that kind with Gods guidance a nice V.I.P place up there huh? If there is a God out there, he loves all the same yeah, but he keeps favorites, I mean those that suffer eternally in hell... I don't like questioning what I do not understand to a certain tangible degree, but does he do this with the same love he treats those that go to heaven?

ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

What did the black man say to the jew and the blonde girl as they walked to the car. Shotgun.

A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because seven threatened to murder his family

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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