Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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#IHateHashtags

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Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

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What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

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Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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What did the fish say to the human ? He didn't say anything fish can't speak.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

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Asians look like they have down syndrome.

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Any similarity between Jesse and a human is purely coincidental!

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops