Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

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Women's Soccer.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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hers a joke... japanese people

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Fine, ladies first.

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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hi

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops