- Anti Joke

a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Why did the boy cut his hair? Because he was large.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

What ended in the year 1970? 1969

How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on