Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is the difference between a dog and a North Korean tank. When I see a dog I think wow, what a cute dog. When I see a North Korean tank I run away screaming, as do many others, and I hope the marines come and save us.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mama so stupid, she put 2 quarters in her ears and said she was istening to Fiftycent

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +80

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops