Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: She was going to speek at a PETA meeting about the cruel conditions of chicken farms. I hit her with my car

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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Why did the guy playing Monopoly sell Boardwalk for $100 to the woman wearing an exotic outfit which shows off her boobs but wouldn't sell Boardwalk for $1000 to the other person that was playing the game? The other person had Park Place as well which would have given them a monopoly on the blue property if he had sold it to that person. And $100 is all the girl had or he would have asked for more but he needed the $100 in order to pay this other player and keep himself from going bankrupt after landing on one of his Hotels.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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The Grinch stole Christmas, he accidentally dropped it and Christmas was ruined for everyone life sucked -shane,Adam,David and Riley go cry about it

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A raccoon walks into a bar. He then proceded to bite 3 people before animal control got him. A black man, hispanic man and an asian man. Later they all walked to the hospital and were treated for rabies, they were all fine as rabies is normally not fatal when caught early. Moral- this story is racist cause the white man was completely unharmed, DONT DISCRIMINATE!

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What did Batman tell Robin when they got to Gotham City? -Robin, we got to Gotham City.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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When life gives you lemon, Squeeze lemon juice in life's eyes Rape it And demand oranges

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other, 'Have you heard about this mad cow disease?' and the other says 'Good thing we're penguins.'

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Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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