Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

One day a black man went and bought a car with his own hard-earned money.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

Why is Texas so hot? The sun

Your so gay, that you like men!

Why the FFUUU did you go back? Because I broke something huur.

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

What did the man say to his dead wife? "I'm Blind."

So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

What sound does a dog make? WOOF What sound does a cat make? MEOW What sound does a giraffe make? ...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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