What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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A jew enters a mall.

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your grandpa's dead So are you.

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roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

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What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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the NAACP

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

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What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops