Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

thumb_up thumb_down -113

A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

thumb_up thumb_down +102

why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down +60

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

thumb_up thumb_down +34

how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops