make me a sandwich!

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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YOLO

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

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Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

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What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

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You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

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17 people are eating doritos in a cafeteria. Then, one gets up and throws their bag away. Then the joke ended. Haha it actually didn't.

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What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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