A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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