Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

What did the racist guy say at the baseball game? I am at a baseball game.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

What is the difference between a dog and a North Korean tank. When I see a dog I think wow, what a cute dog. When I see a North Korean tank I run away screaming, as do many others, and I hope the marines come and save us.

What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

Your mama so stupid, she put 2 quarters in her ears and said she was istening to Fiftycent

Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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