Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

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Why are pills white? Cause they work.

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Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

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Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

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CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

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I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

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Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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What's big and long? My dick.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

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a child swallows a cleaning product, why is he given chocolate milk? to make him happy before he dies

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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