What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

A boy and a girl are each granted a wish Girl: I want us to be lovers until the end of the world Boy: I want the world to end

Knock knock. Its open.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

I once had a friend We had our arguments, and went our separate ways.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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