His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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http://www.com/

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Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops