A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

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A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

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A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

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A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

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What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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Why did the black guy enjoy anal sex? Because he has a phobia of vaginas and only likes to have anal

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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