A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

The Mets win the World Series

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

Two Jews walk in a bar...

A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

Why did the plane crashed? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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