Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

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Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

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A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

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What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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The Mets win the World Series

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where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

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what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Two Jews walk in a bar...

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How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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