Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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im not food

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

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What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

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Justin Bieber

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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What's the difference between a dead dog and a dead black man on the road? One's a dog and one is a man, but more importantly the differences shouldn't be noted in a miserable occasion such as this as both are unfortunate tragedies. Also, one has a big penis.

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women's rights.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

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Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

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two ducks run into each other........ then they walk away

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Whats the difference between a duck? Both legs are of the same length. Especially the left one.

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Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

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So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

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What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops