How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did superman say when he flew into a building? Flying is inhumanly possible unless in an aircraft vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't february march Because april may

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Carlos was attempting to write anti-jokes. He sucks at writing anti-jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops