What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

How do you call a half deaf duck? HEY DUCK!!!!!!

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

What did the snake say to the rat?

How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

I like turtoes.

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

In Soviet Russia its very cold

Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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