In Soviet Russia its very cold

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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why did the black man drown? he cant swim

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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Hey, you have small hands.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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