Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

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What did the the White blood cell say to the bacteria? Nothing. Its a cell. It goes through phagocytosis.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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