What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

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What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

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Why did the man die? He was old.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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Two muffins are sitting in the oven. One says wow its hot in here the other muffin said HOLY SHIT ITS A TALKING MUFFIN

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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