Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

Penis Gabriel - Go eat some ice cream! Boner McDaniels - No. Penis Gabriel - Ok.

Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are best friends and go shopping together.

What is the difference between a pillow and a rock The rock could hert you.

whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

What's a Mexican's favourite sport? Cross-country running.

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

What is funnier than 24 69

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nazi Nazi who? I am the mailman. I nazi your mailbox. Can I leave the letters on the front porch?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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