a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

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How do you call a half deaf duck? HEY DUCK!!!!!!

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

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Q:Why did the dog jump over the fence A:Because he could

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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minorities

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what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops