Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

Guess what? SHADAP

A baby seal walks into a club...

What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

Where does a hobo live? A box.

how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

How Long is a Chinese man.

Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

Like my status for a tbh?

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

Women's Rights

How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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