how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

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What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

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What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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What's the diffrence between a pizza and a black man. One is human being while the other is an inanimate food source.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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ceiling mounted bonerss CC

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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Lacrosse

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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