Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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Your life

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Why did the black guy sing? Cause he can sdf sdfsd f sdf ds f sd fsd f sd f ds g sdfgh fsh sdf h dfsg dfs g df gdfgdf g d yeah thats right

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How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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If I tell you that seeing you happy, is my main motivation towards accepting right now, would you believe me?

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Why does a gay guy come out of the closet? He can't see anything inside.

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Why didn't the women make her husband a sandwitch? Because she was struck by a car as a young child and was told she could never walk again. Her family couldn't afford a wheelchair so therefore she is bedridden all day.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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where's mom I killed her

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

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Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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Did you hear about the man who went up into space without a space suit? He died.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

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A vodka please Sir this is McDonald's Ok sorry, a McVodka please

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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