What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Your mamma's so fat she has diabetes and may die because she may not be able to loose enough weight to keep her blood sugar at a regulated number.

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A friendly individual who cares nothing about racial differences and instead judges people based on character.

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

What's worse that getting raped by a frog? That would never occur, as frogs do not have genitalia to commit rape.

How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

69

What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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