Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

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Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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Whats the difference between an aboriginal and a deer? Nothing, infact they are quite similar, they have no house and smell like wild animals and jaywalk.

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Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

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Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

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What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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guess what? WHAT? Idk.

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What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

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A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

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a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

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knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

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Q: Why did the guy ring the doorbell? A: Because he was sick of all the crappy knock-knock jokes

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What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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