Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

Women's Rights

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

Yah? Well your a ********

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

Hi my name is Bob

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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