What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

This is a joke for Homeless people:

Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

Womens Basketball.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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