Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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What did the very inquisitive poor black guy say to the very rich white man at the train station? Nothing, they didn't know each other. And they both had their iPods in. And they were at different train stations. And they were in different countries. And the black guy died 20 years ago.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Why didn't the little boy hear the ice cream truck? He was deaf.

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How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

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Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

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There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

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Q: What's worse than both of your parents dying in a terrible car accident? A: Sitting in the back seat with your grandparents.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

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What’s the difference between a frog and a duck? One is a frog and one is a duck.

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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