Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what happens when you wake up inception

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey, you have small hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

thumb_up thumb_down +2

My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops