the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

They see me trollin' They hatin'...

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

So a jew walks into a bar!

What's short, ruthless, and asian? Kim Jong Ill

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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