What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

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"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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