a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

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"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

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Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

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Knock knock, come in.

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How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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How many blondes does it take to dye their own hair black and act in an intelligent, sensible manner?

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thumbs up!

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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Penis.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops