SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

thumb_up thumb_down -87

whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

thumb_up thumb_down -101

Nice legs....What time do they open?

thumb_up thumb_down -117

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops