What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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What's black and fast? A treadmill.

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Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

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What kind of drug did the cops catch the alligator with? None. They were going to use a tranquiliser dart, but SPCA intervened and simply held the alligator's mouth shut while they loaded it into a secure cage.

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whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

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The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

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Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

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theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

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your mama so jewish ( fat ) she had to take up two seats on the plane to fly here in the end there was no chocolate left she was taking up the whole plane space.

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What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

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Why was Johnny so mad at his father? Because his father had a constant drinking problem and was very abusive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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