Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

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can you pass the soap?

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? It was taped to the other monkey

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? Its Greg. I forgot my keys, can you let me back in?

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

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What do you call a bird with a broken wing? A bird with a broken wing.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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Derp

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

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Jordan is pregant

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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There's a cat, a dog, a rat and a goat... I don't know how the goat got in there?

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops