I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot. what do you call a woman flying a plane? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the stuntman die? He was gored by a buffalo on a trip to Yellowstone.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops