A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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josh sucks polish adams dick

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why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

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A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

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want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

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Why is it not safe for turkeys to do maths? Because they don't have the mental capacity to carry out the calculations correctly, which would be a danger in jobs such as engineering or the space industry. Furthermore, they are unable to understand the concept of numbers or symbols and therefore have no motivation to solve mathematical problems; and even if they did, they don't have the dexterity or education to write out the solutions.

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

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wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

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What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

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I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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so how about that irline food

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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