Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

Hey, you have small hands.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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