What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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